Tuesday, August 10, 2010

One lucky girl...

An important part of the story of the proposal night I left out is that on our walk back to the hotel Nick gave me 2 ultimatums.  Now that might sound strange, but let me explain. (And remember I already had the ring on my finger so I would have probably agreed to just about anything at that point but luckily they weren't that outrageous)

The first ultimatum was that I not be a bridezilla which I figured was rather fair. I told him that if he ever felt like I was turning into a bridezilla he could call me out on it and I would stop.  17 days into the engagement and he hasn't had to call me out yet...I consider that a success!

The other ultimatum was that this wedding would be about us; not just my dreams but his too.  He wants to be just as much a part of this process as I am.  Now how could a girl say no to that.  So we made a deal to go through the whole process with each other and to make every decision together.  He is so committed to this deal that he even went to a wedding show with me last weekend and I don't think he was completely miserable!  We have also decided to blog together giving both our perspectives of each step of the process.  (I referenced his blog in the last post but in case you missed it here is the link http://theotherviewofido.blogspot.com/)

Now don't get me wrong this making every decision together does have a downside.  Let's be honest every girl has little details that they dream about being part of their wedding.  For me one of those was exciting the reception to sparklers like this:

I mean how cool does that look!  Now for those of you who don't know (I will spare all the real nasty details) Nick had a small accident with some sparklers a few years back that resulted in some pretty nasty burns.  I had a feeling he wouldn't be thrilled about the idea but thought maybe just maybe when he saw how cool it looked he would change his mind and decide sparklers weren't so bad after all.  Unfortunately, I was wrong; he still seems to be rather traumatized by the event and was really not thrilled with the idea.   Like I said I wasn't completely unprepared for a no, but actually hearing it stung just a little and I may have wished just for a second that he would just do the stereotypical groom thing and not care (and yes I am well aware this was just a bit selfish).  After I pouted just a little we talked about it and decided we would come up with a different plan that was just as cool (any and all ideas are welcome!)

So clearly this deal wasn't quite as easy as I thought it would be and it's going to take a little work on my part to let go of control and really be open to him having just as much say as I do and making compromises when necessary but I think it will be a good life lesson for both of us.  And in the end I think I really am one lucky girl and by him being as involved as I am this really will be OUR dream day!


  1. Uhoh...Martha letting go of control...of something like her wedding!?!? That is quite the ultimatum, you must really like him ;) Unfortunately I don't have any suggestions as cool as the sparklers...but I'll think on it. Did you tell him that he wouldn't have to actually touch any of the sparklers???

  2. but i LOVE sparklers :(

    perhaps i missed the point of this post?

  3. I love sparklers too! Maybe we can make it happen on a smaller scale? Twinkle lights?!

  4. Don't compromise, give him a flame proof glove, not your fault he didn't realize what a sparkler bomb was.